The ramblings, rants, and observations of an Orthodox Reactionary. Feel free to look around!

Thursday, April 30, 2009


So, I changed my major yesterday to History. It's about friggin' time, if you ask me.

Anyways, Dr. Wineland and I figgered out that I would need 46 credit hours to graduate with a B/A in History. If I play my cards right, I can get out in 3 semesters.

And take a maymester class.
And testing out of another class (U.S. History II)
And take a summer class.
And take three classes(Philosophy, World Geography, and American Government) elsewhere because while they are required, they are not available here in the next three semesters.


Man, not looking forward to it.

Oh, and I'm looking for a job this summer, too.


"Hard pressed on my right. My center is yielding. Impossible to maneuver. Situation excellent. I attack."-General Foch's telegraph to French High Command, the First Battle of the Marne

Wednesday, April 29, 2009

My life...

So I've been struggling with a lot of stuff.

A woman, mostly. I don't want to go into a lot of detail, but basically, I gave my heart to someone. It has been in her possession for as long as I have known her. Recently, she decided that my love was not good enough, nor was my friendship.

I learned very recently from a third party (trustworthy source, if you're curious) that she told that person that she did not love me anymore.

I lack the skill to describe in words what happened to me on Monday night. I can only explain (inadequately) that I literally lost all hope. Not, "OMG, this is so terrible, I'm heartbroken." I was certainly that, of course. But this was worse. Literally, All. Hope. Gone.

I had no future, no reason to live.

Let's try an analogy, shall we?

Do you remember the boat scene in Superman Returns? The Nice-Guy-Who-Is-Not-The Hero tries to do it himself, tries to save the day. But the situation is more than a mere mortal can handle. Though the attempt is noble, he fails, and Guy futilely pounds the glass as he and everything he truly cares about is sinking beneath the waves of despair, plunging away from the light of life to suffer a slow death, cold and alone. And then--

Boots on the porthole. The music builds at the arrival of the World's Greatest Hero. Where lesser men fail, He never fails. No problem is beyond His ability to handle. Even if He dies to do it, He will save the day.

The Hero lifts him out of his despair, away from death, and back into the light. He casually tears away the hatch, and looks down. And He speaks.

"Give Me your hand." The one and only-- or 'only begotten', if that's your flavor-- Superman.

There have been two points in my life where God so openly and inevitably moved that I could feel Him; only two points where He-- literally!-- saved my mortal life.

Once was in Afghanistan.
The other was Monday, April 27th, 2009.

But Christ did what no comic-book character could do: He gave me hope back.

God created me for a reason. He has brought me here, to this place and this time, to do something. What, I don't know. But I do know that if it *is* that good, that whatever I'm to do is so important that He will perform genuine miracles to make sure it happens...

I wanna stick around, and see what it is.

"Be of good cheer; for I have overcome the World." -Jesus Christ

Friday, April 17, 2009

Patience, and Freedom in a Holster ;)

I think God is teaching me patience.

Don't ask why, it's just been a rough couple of weeks. But one thing I have noticed about all the myriad and different phases I have been through, one thing remains constant: I have no control over the next step. It is always out of my hands.

So, I assume I am being taught patience. That is one of my bigger character flaws, methinks.

Hunh. Couldn't he teach me some other time? And under different circumstances?

Anyhow, it was really nice out today-- I mean, really nice. I usually don't care too much about the temperature, or the sunshine, or trees blooming and birds chirping-- at least, I didn't used to.

I know I've changed in some big, fundamental ways. But little things still get to me. Like appreciating what kind of day it is outside. I'm thinking I understand now what Sather said over there, about how the quality of life counts. It was a different subject, but I think it applies here.

I want to go camping. I want to hike, and hunt, and fish. I want to head away from the cities, away from the press of humanity. I want to see nature, and appreciate it like I never have before.

I open carried my handgun today. It was glorious. Like wearing freedom on my hip. (I'm laughing at that line, BTW.) I can't wait until I get my concealed carry license, so I can carry my Glock almost everywhere.

I don't have names for my firearms. Should I name them? If so, what?
"Stop quoting laws to us. We carry swords."-Pompeius Magnus

Thursday, April 16, 2009

Oh Noes! I'm turning into a crazy gun nut!

Not gonna lie, folks.

I went to Afghanistan, and came home with a love for firearms. On my 2-week leave, I bought a Mossberg 500 and two AR-15s, one of which I have recently sold.

When I got home for good, I bought an AK-47 and an M1 Garand. And lots and lots of ammo.

I filed my taxes on Tuesday, and in celebration of my rather sizeable return, I went and bought a handgun.

Behold, the Glock 30 SF (Short Frame), chambered for .45 ACP!

User-friendly, tough, and perfectly sized for concealed carry. I think this is probably the most expensive hobby I have ever picked up.

Buy firearms, people. And since I'm all about the gettin' of knowledge, I will now perform the end-post ritual of AWESOME Quotations from AWESOME PEOPLE.
"Loneliness. The American grizzly lives out his life alone. Indomitable, unconquered - but always alone. He has no real allies, only enemies, but none of them as great as he.
The world will never love us. They respect us - they might even grow to fear us. But they will never love us, for we have too much audacity! And, we're a bit blind and reckless at times too.
The American grizzly embodies the spirit of America. He should be our symbol! Not that ridiculous eagle." -Theodore Roosevelt, The Wind and the Lion(1975)

Wednesday, April 15, 2009

Hey, I haven't forgotten!

Still got this blog, but I've been busy, so I haven't updated it. May continue in the near future.

"Now I've always liked you Byron; but You never knew when to shut up.

Even bad men love their mamas."